Things that I care about

My brain is shockingly low on that list. Apparently. Which sucks, because I need it.

I have invented a new machine.

I call it the "Universal Entropy Increasing Machine."

Look around, I keep it all over the place. Never mind any local decreases in entropy you may witness, that is but a small scale aberration. Rest assured, the machine is working.

Well, don't rest assured. Or Not. Really, it doesn't matter, so much. The details are inconsequential. Or inevitable. Whatever.

A List of things I am Going to do Before I Stop Talking About How Cool Cephalopods Are

Well, let's get the obvious ones out of the way:
1.) Eat
2.) shower
3.) behave in a condescending manner towards you
4.) behave in a condescending manner towards a cephalopod
5.) accept a bribe over $5,000 from a political lobby
6.) Tell that lobby how they would be cooler if they could change color under direct neural control.
7.) accept any bribe (really any, please, just, go nuts)
8.) get drunk (not that this is a necessary condition for a cephalopod rant, but it is certainly a sufficient condition).
9.) Get tired. I may slow down a bit.

and finally, perhaps depressingly,

10.) die. That is the only way I will Ever shut up. Ever.

How is it that Congress does not have a projector?

A rare political post, thankfully lacking any real political content:

But

How it that that Congress does not have a projector? Or many projectors? I can walk into any room on my campus that can seat more than 15 people, and they all have a projector wired up so that any laptop can seamlessly deliver a powerpoint presentation by plugging in a single cable.

Every time I see someone speaking in congress, the House and the Senate, they have these shitty little placards balanced on a tripod next to them, and some poor page has to run back and forth to get everything together. Are our members of congress just old and incompetent with technology? No, I know plenty of old people who can hack it on powerpoint. It can't be budgetary. Hell, even with the really high ceilings in the capital: just hang one off the top, or embed it in a podium lower somewhere. Project it from behind the screen.

This is not hard. I see no excuse. That is, except for my favorite political argument: Fuck them. So there. Fuck them, and that is why they need to post stupid cardboard posters whenever they want to show graphic data.